How Kikuyu men brag about their success while pretending it’s humility

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Kikuyu men have a special way to brag about their success while pretending it’s humility .

When you laud them for an expensive suit ,they are like …”hehehehe waaaasha hiyo maneno wewe,.. hii Ni kitu ya hapa Little Red, Kimathi Street. Ukiwa na 100K utaipata. Hata urundishiwe like 2K ya lunch. It’s not those veeeery expensive ones “….

You hear he bought a new home in Muthaiga and you try to congratulate him and he is like ….”aaaaii ashaa … si ati Niko ati Muthaiga proper….. Ni hii pande ingine ya chini hapa karibu Karura Forest. Huko kwa akina Wanjigi 1 acre goes for 400 million. Kwetu with 280 m pekee utapata an acre.”..

You bump into him driving a new German machine. You laud him…..”hey boss, you got a great machine”.. He is like …….” Not really, this is just X 5, siku hizi Kuna hata X6. Hii yangu is only 8.5 M”..

When you meet them after sometimes and you enquire where they have been they are like ….. “…..nilikuwa nimekimbia kidogo na hapa chini Johannesburg. These days sipendi long haul flights. I do Africa pekee, ……eeeeeh nikienda Sana Ni Dubai and not more than 4 times a month…no kugeria tu …”

When you enquire about their kids , they are like ….” We transferred them to some other school by the way…….. Sijui nilisikia mama yao akiita hio shule aje….. I think….eeh Braeburn ama kitu Kama hio”…

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When you exclaim of huge fees there they are like …….”well……. not sure. I did them a ka small cheque ya 3million wajipange nayo. Sitaki mahali nitakuwa nikipigiwa pigiwa simu ati una fees balances ama other debt stories…”

About their rental properties they are always like …..”naomba tu mungu anipee pesa ya kumalizia tu nyumba twangu ” When you ask them kwani ako na tu nyumba ngapi they are like …….” Mimi ni maskini ya mungu …., ngorofa mbili town center sio kitu ya kuongea sana …””

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